


Our Hearts Still Beat the Same

by shions_heart



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M, Mentions of Past Kenhina, Past Relationship(s), Pining, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-17
Updated: 2016-09-17
Packaged: 2018-08-15 10:58:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8053702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shions_heart/pseuds/shions_heart
Summary: Kuroo's been in love with Kenma for as long as he can remember. The fact that his best friend seemed to have no interest in guys never changed that. Then years went by, their lives went in different directions, and distance grew between them. But now Kenma is back, and old feelings begin to resurface.





	Our Hearts Still Beat the Same

**Author's Note:**

  * For [aurigae](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aurigae/gifts).



> the beautiful and lovely Katrin commissioned me to write post-college kuroken get together, so! I wish I could've gone deeper into this, written something long and slow build . . . but I simply didn't have the time. /)u(\
> 
> I hope you enjoy it anyway! <3

**22:46**  
**From:** Kenma  
**Subject:** (no subject)  
_hey. i got a job in the city. be moving there in a couple weeks._

_thought we could meet up or something._

_let me know._

 

 

Kuroo Tetsurou stands in front of the mirror in his bathroom, buttoning the top button of his shirt before unbuttoning it again. His fingers keep trembling, and he flexes his hands slowly. Taking a step back, he surveys his ensemble, wondering if he's missing anything.

"What's with the preening? Didn't you say this guy was just a friend from high school?"

His roommate, Daishou Suguru, leans in the doorway, smirking at him.

Kuroo resists the urge to throw something at him. "He was never _just_ a friend," he admits, adjusting his collar one more time in the mirror before pushing past Daishou to go find his shoes.

Daishou follows him, sticking to his side not unlike a leech. Kuroo is grateful for the guy if only because he helps with the rent, but otherwise he can be pretty annoying.

"So what? You guys dated or something?"

Kuroo shakes his head. "No, he's . . . he's not like that."

"So why are you so nervous?"

"I'm _not_ —" Kuroo cuts himself off, lifting his head to frown up at Daishou, who's still smirking at him. "Shut up," he mutters, standing and making his way to the door. "Don't wait up."

The truth is Kuroo _is_ nervous. It's been years since he's seen his best friend, Kozume Kenma, in person. When he left for university, they kept in touch over text and Skype, but both of their schedules filled up quickly and where they once talked every day their conversations have started spanning days or even weeks. It leaves a bad taste in Kuroo's mouth to think of all the time they've lost, and he can't deny that his heart pounds faster at the thought of seeing Kenma again.

He just hopes he doesn't accidentally say nor do anything stupid.

Like confess that he has feelings for Kenma that have clung to his heart ever since high school. Not even the few relationships he's had since then have been able to shake these feelings, and so far nothing's worked out with anyone else. He blames his busy schedule; he makes excuses such as "we just weren't compatible" or "there weren't any fireworks, you know?"

But the fact of the matter is that Kuroo's been pining after his best friend since high school.

He _really_ hopes he doesn't make a fool out of himself.

 

 

 

They meet at a restaurant. Kuroo waits outside, not entirely sure when Kenma will arrive. He tells himself to stop being nervous, that they're still friends despite the distance that's grown between them. But his mind keeps going to the fact that, although Kenma's been in a relationship since high school, he is now no longer with that person. Kenma wouldn't give him all the details of the break-up, but Kuroo had done his best to be there for him anyway, despite the miles that separated them.

It's stupid to think of this now, he berates himself. So what if Kenma's single? That doesn’t mean anything. It's not like he'll be interested in dating Kuroo even if he asked . . .

He's so lost in his thoughts, he doesn't realize Kenma's in front of him until he feels a tug on his jacket sleeve. Lifting his gaze from his shoes, he stares at the young man that's standing before him.

For a moment, he gapes. Although he's seen recent photos, he didn't realize that Kenma had grown taller. Instead of fitting beneath his chin, he now only has to tilt his head back a few centimeters to meet Kuroo's gaze. His hair has grown out and brushes his shoulders, blonde tips in a mess of dark brown. He's wearing a large hoodie over slim-fitting jeans, and he looks _good_.

Kuroo's tongue stops working.

"Kuro . . . you're staring."

Kenma's lips quirk slightly in a faint smile, and Kuroo shakes himself out of his daze.

"Ah sorry." Grinning sheepishly, he rubs the back of his neck. "You just look so . . . different."

Kenma tilts his head, some of his hair falling into his face. Kuroo resists the urge to reach out and brush it back, curling his fingers into fists at his sides. In the end, Kenma does himself, twisting half of his hair back in a small tail, letting the rest hang free. Kuroo turns his gaze to the restaurant.

"They're holding a table for us," he says unnecessarily, stepping forward to open the door.

Kenma looks at him, and there's a faint wrinkle in his forehead. Kuroo recognizes that expression. It's the one he always wears when he's trying to figure something out.

_He's probably wondering why I'm acting so strange._

Keeping his gaze firmly ahead, Kuroo steps up to the hostess stand and gives her his name. She leads them to a table, Kenma remarkably silent. Then again, he always has been quiet. Maybe Kuroo's simply gotten used to their texts. He hears Kenma's voice so often in his head . . .

"It's not a bad different," he says finally once they're seated. "Sorry. I was just . . . surprised."

"You look different too," Kenma states, eyes roving over the undercut and piercings.

Kuroo reaches up to touch one ear with a crooked smile. "Bokuto dragged me to this place where he was getting his done and I figured, hey why not? Got a lot of chicks' attention at least."

Kenma's stare is bland. "Is that what you wanted?"

Kuroo shrugs. "It felt good to be cool for a while."

Kenma rolls his eyes, looking over his menu then. Kuroo fiddles with his napkin, already knowing what he wants to order though not entirely sure he'll be able to eat it with his stomach tied up in so many knots.

"So, what's your new job?" he asks finally. "You didn't say in your text."

"Oh." Kenma's gaze slides off to the side. "I'm working with a start-up company on this video game . . ."

"Really?!" Kuroo grins. "That's great! That's exactly what you want to be doing, right? Designing games?"

"Yeah." Kenma lowers his head, but not before Kuro catches a glimpse of the smile that's playing about his lips.

"You're excited," Kuroo gathers, still able to read Kenma like a book after all these years. He can't help but feel pretty smug about that fact.

"Yeah," Kenma admits, a pleased flush coloring his cheeks.

"You're going to be amazing," Kuroo says, and he's unable to keep the fondness out of his voice.

Kenma glances up at him through his eyelashes, and Kuroo's heart stutters in his chest.

_This is bad. This is really bad._

"What about you?" Kenma asks, changing the subject not at all subtly.

"Am I going to be amazing? Well, I'm always amazing, so I'm not sure what you're getting at." Kuroo smirks, as Kenma kicks him gently under the table.

"You know what I mean."

"My job's fine." Kuroo shrugs. "Advertising is interesting, though I deal with a lot of idiots."

"So, like high school," Kenma quips, biting his lip.

Kuroo laughs. "You could say that, yeah," he says with a nod. "But it's fun coming up with new and exciting ways to get people to buy shit. Frustrating at times, but fun."

"What happened to going into biochemistry?"

Kuroo shrugs. "The job market isn't good for it. But that's why I double-majored; just in case something opens up."

Kenma shakes his head. "I still can't believe you did that. You were exhausted all the time. You kept falling asleep on our Skype calls."

Kuroo rubs the back of his neck, fighting the blush that's rising to his face. "Ah, yeah, sorry about that."

"It's fine." Kenma looks back at his menu, and Kuroo almost misses his mumbled, "It was cute."

His face burns. Turning quickly in his seat, he waves down the waitress, suddenly ravenous.

Halfway through the meal and conversation, Kenma finally asks the question Kuroo's been dreading this entire time.

"Where's your girlfriend?"

Kuroo winces, setting aside his chopsticks. "Yeah . . . about that . . ."

"You broke up."

"She just . . . wasn't the right girl for me." Kuroo chews on his lip. It's one thing to lie to Kenma over the phone. It's another to say it right to his face. Kenma's eyes bore holes into his skull, as he continues to avoid eye-contact.

"That's what you said about the last one."

"I know . . ."

"And the one before that."

"I know. I know."

"Are you okay?"

Kuroo glances up, noting the slight frown of concern on Kenma's features. He gives him a crooked grin. "Of course," he lies smoothly. The words taste like dirt in his mouth, but he can't tell Kenma the truth. "What about you?" he quickly continues. "Any new people in your life?"

Kenma shakes his head.

"Maybe you'll meet someone here!" _Why did I just say that?!_

But Kenma's shaking his head again. "I don't think I want to," he says.

"Oh? Why not?" Kuroo inwardly curses his rapidly beating heart.

Kenma shrugs and turns back to his food. Kuroo isn't sure what to make of that, but he can tell Kenma is done with this conversation. They talk about other things as the night goes on; mostly Kenma rambles about the game he's working on. Kuroo doesn't mind, however, because Kenma always gets so animated when he talks about games in a way he doesn't for any other topic.

As the meal draws to a close (Kuroo insists on paying for them both, despite the frown Kenma gives him when he grabs the check), Kuroo can't help but want to prolong the night. He knows he'll get to see Kenma more often now that he's in the city, but it feels like they need to make up for lost time somehow.

"Hey, could you show me your new apartment?"

Kenma glances at him skeptically. "Tonight?"

"I don't have any plans."

Kenma shrugs then, seemingly indifferent, but Kuroo counts it as a win. They walk down the sidewalk side by side, shoulders nearly brushing. The crisp fall breeze cuts through Kuro's jacket, and he glances sidelong at Kenma, wondering if that hoodie is enough for him. Upon closer inspection, however, he recognizes it.

"Hey . . . isn't that my hoodie?"

Kenma's shoulders lift toward his ears, as he hunches forward. "You left it at mine."

"Yeah, like, years ago. You kept it?"

Kenma looks down at it, tugging absently on the string of the hood. "It fits better now. It's nice."

Kuroo isn't sure what his heart is doing, but he has to swerve around a pole before he runs into it. Kenma snickers softly, and Kuroo's stomach erupts with butterflies. Coughing into his hand, he hastens to change the subject.

"Do you have any roommates?"

Kenma shakes his head.

"Wow, you must be getting paid well over at that company, huh?"

Kenma shrugs. "It's enough."

"I bet you can't guess who my roommate is." Kuroo stuffs his hands into his pockets, grinning down at Kenma.

Kenma frowns faintly in thought, stepping up to an apartment. "It's not Bokuto, because he told me he moved in with Akaashi."

"It's Daishou."

Kenma pauses, turning to stare up at him in disbelief. "Daishou? Daishou Suguru?"

"I know, right?! It's awful," Kuroo says, leaning against the wall beside Kenma's front door, as he moves to unlock it. "He was the only one to reply to my ad for a roommate, and he makes decent money, so it's not like I can really _complain_. But he's just as annoying as he was in high school."

"Sucks to be you," Kenma says, smirking. Opening the door, he steps inside the apartment, Kuroo following suit. They take off their shoes together and Kuroo hangs up his coat, before Kenma leads him further in.

"Your empathy is truly touching," Kuroo says, shaking his head.

The apartment it small but spacious, enough for one person to live comfortably at least. Kenma walks over to the couch in the front room, sitting and pulling his knees up to his chest. Kuroo goes to sit as well, but before he can a cat jumps onto the couch.

"Oh! You finally got one," Kuroo says, surprised yet not to see the animal.

Kenma smiles faintly, stroking the top of the cat's head. It's pure black, its fur long and luxurious. Kuroo waits for Kenma to introduce them, but he simply keeps petting the cat, as it makes itself at home in Kuroo's spot.

Realizing he's not going to be able to cuddle on the couch with Kenma, Kuroo turns away to hide his disappointment. Instead he looks toward the bookshelf. Most of it is full of games, but there are also a few framed photos. Kenma's not the sentimental type, so Kuroo wonders if his mom had them framed for him.

He steps over to look at them, eyes catching a head of familiar bright orange-red hair in one. He picks it up off the shelf, looking down at the photo of Hinata from Karasuno with his arm slung around Kenma's neck. He's holding Kenma close, grinning so broadly at the camera that his eyes are nearly shut. He's holding up two fingers in a peace sign, while Kenma's arms are at his side.

The most significant part of the photo, however, is the fact that Kenma's eyes are on Hinata. And the expression on his face is faint, but Kuro can read it as clear as day.

"What is this?" he asks, turning and holding up the photo.

Kenma grows still. Annoyed that Kenma's attention has been diverted, the cat hops off the couch and disappears around a corner. Kuroo approaches, holding the photo out to Kenma.

Kenma takes it slowly, clutching it in both hands, as he looks down at it.

"I know that face," Kuroo says, doing his best to keep any accusation out of his voice. But he can't help but feel betrayed in some way. If he's right about this, if Kenma really did have feelings for Hinata outside of friendship . . . "That's a date, isn't it?"

"Yes," Kenma admits softly.

"That's the person you broke up with."

". . . Yes."

"This whole time . . . are you . . . why didn't you . . .?" Kuroo isn't sure what he's trying to ask. He doesn't want Kenma to feel like he did something wrong because, technically, he didn't. But at the same time . . .

"I'm your best friend, aren't I? that hasn't changed, has it?"

Kenma shakes his head, his eyes still on the photo.

"Then why didn't you _tell_ me? Did you think that I wouldn't accept you? Did I somehow make you feel like you couldn't trust me with something like this?" Kuroo's chest feels hollow, his heart in his stomach. Kenma still won't look at him; he just keeps shaking his head over and over.

"It doesn't matter."

"The fuck it doesn’t matter. Kenma, you kept this a secret from me, and I want to know why." Maybe he's being unreasonable. Maybe he's being selfish to demand an answer from him, but the hurt is coiling in his stomach, tightening around it like a vice.

"You didn't need to know."

"Your best friend didn't need to know that you're gay. Right, that makes sense." Kuroo can't keep the sarcasm from his tone, but he regrets it instantly when Kenma flinches. Running a hand through his hair, he sits down beside Kenma on the couch, slumped over his knees, as he looks down at his hands dangling between them.

"I'm sorry. I just . . . I don’t understand why you'd keep such a big part of you hidden from me. Please. I know you're not good with words, but please explain it to me. I need to know." Kuroo turns to look at him; and the hand in his gut twists when he notices the tears gathering in the corners of Kenma's eyes.

"Fuck. Kenma, I—"

"I couldn't tell you," Kenma says, his voice low, his hands clutching the picture frame so tightly they begin to tremble.

"Why couldn't you tell me?" Kuroo asks, keeping his voice gentle this time. "Do you not trust me?"

Kenma shakes his head again. Tentatively, Kuroo reaches out to brush a loose strand of hair away from Kenma's face. Kenma ducks his head, and the hair falls back into place. Sighing, Kuroo pulls back, telling himself not to push.

"I'm sorry I raised my voice at you," Kuroo says, looking up at the ceiling. "You're right. It doesn't matter. You don't have to tell me anything. I know we haven't even been close recently, I just . . ." Realizing he's going to have to bite the bullet, Kuroo sits up, grimacing, as he turns to look at Kenma more fully.

"I love you, Kenma. Like, I'm _in love_ with you. I have been for a really long time. I never said anything because, well, I didn't think you liked guys. I didn't keep it a secret that I was into guys and girls; you knew that about me, right?"

Kenma's frozen beside him, not moving even to acknowledge his question.

"At least, I thought you did. I guess it's hypocritical to have expected you to tell me something that I didn't exactly sit down and tell you myself. But you _told_ me you were with someone. I assumed it was a girl, and you never corrected me on that. Why not?"

"It was easier," Kenma murmurs.

" _Why?_ "

Kenma lifts his head finally, turning to look at him. His eyes are wet; and his mouth purses into a straight line before he answers.

"I'm in love with you too."

Kuroo's brain fizzes out for a moment, as he stares back at Kenma, dumbstruck.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want things to change. I _liked_ how we were, and I was afraid . . . things would get weird. Especially since I couldn't tell if you felt the same; and then I was with Shouyou and it was good for a while but then it was just . . . exhausting and he . . ." Kenma shakes his head as though clearing away a bad thought. "I was _going_ to tell you when I texted you after the breakup, but by then you were with someone so I figured I lost my chance and—"

Kuroo doesn't wait for him to finish. He surges forward, taking Kenma's face between his hands and kissing him. Surprisingly, Kenma doesn't stiffen or pull away. Instead, he immediately grabs the front of Kuroo's shirt, clutching it tightly as he presses closer, kissing him back deeply.

Groaning softly, unable to believe this is really happening, Kuroo moves one hand down to Kenma's waist, moving it around to the small of his back then to hold him tightly. Kenma's lips are insistent, demanding. They move against his with almost bruising force, almost like he's afraid Kuroo will disappear if he doesn’t hold him as firmly as he can.

"Hey, hey," Kuroo murmurs, leaning back slightly to set his forehead against Kenma's. He's breathless, somewhat dizzy, and his heart is pounding wildly in his chest. But he takes a moment to smooth Kenma's hair back from his face and offer him a small smile.

"I'm right here. You're not going to lose me. I promise."

Kenma bites his lip, nodding. Kuroo gently pulls the lip out from between his teeth with his thumb, moving to kiss him again, this time soft and sweet. His chest feels full now, threatening to burst, but he maneuvers on the couch some, shifting them so that Kenma's lying beneath him. He cocoons Kenma as best he can, and Kenma arches into him, fingers digging into his scalp, twisting in his hair. Kuroo kisses him with all the pent-up feelings he's been experiencing since high school and it feels so good, so _good_ to finally let it all out.

"So, ha," Kuroo pants, as he breaks away once more for air. "Since you don't have a roommate . . . does this mean I can spend the night?"

He raises an eyebrow, smirking faintly.

Kenma stares back at him impassively. "No."

Kuroo's heart plummets to his feet. "Oh," he says, a flush of embarrassment flooding his cheeks. "Uh. Okay. Sorry. I'll just—"

He starts to move back, but then Kenma snorts softly, grabbing him around the neck and pulling him back down.

"I was kidding," Kenma whispers into his ear, before giving it a tiny lick.

Kuroo's entire body turns to jelly, and his hand trembles, as he returns it to Kenma's side. "O-okay," he says, suddenly nervous and having no idea why.

Kenma shakes his head at him, massaging the back of his neck. "Relax," he says softly. "We don't have to do anything tonight."

"Can I just . . . hold you for a little while?" Kuroo asks, feeling incredibly lame.

Thankfully, Kenma doesn't make fun of him. He simply nods, and they shift so that they're lying side by side on the couch. It's cramped, but Kuroo curls his arm around Kenma's waist and holds him close to his chest.

"I missed you so much," Kuroo murmurs into his hair.

"I missed you too," Kenma admits quietly, still stroking his fingers through Kuroo's hair.

It's a little unbelievable to think that just this morning they were simply friends meeting up after time apart. Now Kuroo can't imagine them as being anything other than what they are right now. And he hopes they can continue to be this way for as long as they live.

**Author's Note:**

> the cat's name is "Kuro"
> 
> http://shions-heart.tumblr.com/


End file.
